Part Eight of an interview with: Ren

I think shows like yours are so important and so wonderful to have as not just an educational tool, but a celebration. When I see you on stage, you’re celebrating so much; just the energy that you have there is just so vibrant. I really admire that. It’s made me questions the conventions and things that I’ve been coming into my own as a woman there’s this, “Okay, who am I really putting the makeup on for today?” All those things that I’m having a conversation with (myself) I thought were-I had to raise to this standard of women...pass this threshold. Even when I did, even at that point, a person may misgender me or not take my gender seriously. It’s (about) understanding where that threshold is for me.

 

That’s unfortunately a part of what I understand about the culture of being a woman in a patriarchy. Which is that...there’s no limit to the number of things that society tells you that you need to do to be woman enough, and there’s no limit to the amount of things that you’re not supposed to do to be man enough. That’s where I think those cultures and labels can be prisons. We really all have to be brave and women or men or non-binary in our own way. I think we’re really on our own adventure. We just take comfort when we see other people go on a similar nearby path and leaving memories and milestones along the way that we can recognize. I really do believe that we’re all a part of this amazing family and if we put just a little bit of effort we could experience empathy and understanding on a great number of things that we share. The experiences we have while some are much more extreme than others in terms of the push back of being who we are and there’s lost of people who don’t put a lot of thought into being their authentic selves, they’re just...managing the recipe they’ve been handed.

 

They’re on autopilot.

 

They’re on a kind of autopilot. And it may or may not hit them someday and that’s their life to live. This is the birthplace of responsibility. If you know that there’s something true about you that maybe doesn’t quite fit what you’ve been told that you are, and that I think is universal. Because we’re all told who we are from a very young age by people who have no idea who we are unless they’re saying, “You are everything. You can be everything.” Parent’s aren’t really keen to do that. What does that mean for them? There’s very practical reasons why they limit us. They want us to be manageable and pleasant...palatable. All these other things. It’s an unlearning. It’s a great unlearning and relearning. For those of us who can do it, as difficult as it is, I do think that we attract each other and find each other and create community around that. And that is revolutionary.